graham, asher trace

[asher]

ashertracegraham
eighteen. senior. distant.depressed.scared.chace crawford.

Being born to a normal family doesn't even begin to describe the Casper native. When he was younger everything was fine, he had great parents who doted on him whenever he was good, or pretty much whenever, and a normal older brother that was bugged by him but secretly loved him to pieces. He was a good kid who listened to every word his parents said and would get upset every time his brother was mad. When he was six, he saw his parents yelling at his brother, who was taking the wrap for something Asher had actually done. He felt horrible for it and ran in the room crying for them to stop being mad at his brother that it was all his fault. Of course, since he was the younger brother he was let off the hook because he didn't know any better.

Throughout elementary school and middle school the boy excelled in everything. He did almost every sport and couldn't make enough friends to be satisfied, anyone he came in contact with he had to talk to and befriend. He was the guy ever girl wanted to date and who every guy wanted to be friends with. He never let anything get to his head, he was always so humble and calm. Made straight A's and participated in any sport that he could, football was his favorite and best sport. He continued to play that up through middle school into high school. He made the varsity team his freshman year and was the happiest he could've been. He was convinced that he was just meant for high school, that his best years were ahead of him.

When he turned fifteen he, of course, acquired his driving permit and that was one of his favorite days, looking back he wished he failed, though. About three months after getting his permit, he had already drove a great deal of times because he really wanted his damn license. He wanted a car to be able to show off to all his friends and drive to dates on his own. When the fourth month rolled around, his mother had offered to take him out driving. It was the first time he drove with her because his older brother always said that their mom was always so tense and jumpy when she was teaching him how to drive, so Asher took the easy way out so he wouldn't be freaking out while driving and learned from his dad. But this time she seemed so excited to see his progress so he really couldn't turn her down.

After an hour of driving, his mom told Asher to head back to their house and so he did. The entire time he was being yelled at and had to deal with his mom grabbing his arm every five minutes to warn him about a bird or something. He loved his mom to death but at one of the red lights he couldn't take it anymore and exploded on her saying that if he's driving bad while she's yelling than there's the reason right there and that she could teach him how to drive without flipping out for the smallest of reasons. After the light turned green, he started driving, agitated now, and wasn't paying full attention to what he was doing. When he finally heard a noise out of his mother it was a scream telling him to look out for the guard rail, but it was already too late. He had been off in his own little world trying to calm down and accidently went too far over and by the time his mom yelled, he tried to swerve but the back bumper hit the guard rail which caused the car to spin against it again before just flipping over it completely and rolling down the hill. If it wasn't for his mother getting over him, Asher would have been done for but instead he only had a few cracked ribs and an arm broken in two places, along with many bruises and some cuts.

When Asher had woken up from passing out from hitting his head, he only saw his brother standing over him worriedly. Looking around not seeing his father or his mother, he questioned what happened and where they were, the only thing Asher could remember was driving with his mother and then he woke up in the hospital. When his brother said that his father was talking to the doctors but nothing about their mother, he pressed on until he finally heard his brother yell that their mother had died in the wreck. As soon as he said Asher remembered that he was so upset with his mother and the last thing he did was yell at her.

The fifteen year old didn't talk for a week and stayed at home with their father who wouldn't even come near his youngest son anymore after finding out what fully happened hearing the police report saying that it was the drivers fault, not a freak accident. After weeks of just going about a routine, not a smile came across the boy's face. He wouldn't speak at school to anyone, not even his best of friends or any of his teammates. Only would he speak, and just barely, if the teachers asked him to answer a question. He quit every sports team and club he was in and only left the house to go to school and eat if his brother would take him out to do so. The once happy-go-lucky Asher Graham was brought deep into depression's grasp and it seemed to not let go.

Two months of silence between Asher and his father, the man finally came in Asher's room and was clearly drunk, and just stared at him. Asher asked his father what's wrong but before he really could say anything more his dad picked up his bedroom lamp and threw it at him. It struck Asher's left arm, his broken one, and he couldn't help but scream out in pain. His brother, Isaac, would have rushed in if he wasn't away for a class, so Asher was left to get attacked by the man he had looked up to and protected by for so long. He finally stopped after ten minutes of straight rage and screaming out asking how could Asher kill his own mother and what a horrible person he was. After he left, Asher curled up in his bed bloody and bruised once more. When Isaac came home and peeked in to check on his little brother, he asked him what happened and all Asher could come up with was that the football team was pissed that he quit. Isaac tried to say that he'd teach them a lesson, but he knew that it'd be illegal and couldn't be sent to jail.

Asher's doctor did suggest that he see a therapist, though, because he had already gone through so much and needed to talk to someone about it. All Asher talked about at those meetings, though, about how he wanted a cigarette, which he picked up that habit after the accident. He told the therapist about what he used to want to do when he graduated high school, and said he didn't feel like it any more. With Asher's injuries and problems at home, his grades wasn't exactly exemplary anymore, in fact he was failing every class. The boy didn't care anymore and his arms were usually too sore from his father, he continued his habit of drinking and taking his anger out on the person who supposedly caused his problems, he just couldn't stand being around anyone anymore but his brother, the only person he still believed he could count on.

He almost failed his sophomore year and would have if it wasn't for Isaac doing everything he could to help his little brother not fall behind. But Asher couldn't care less about school anymore. Not friends, not his future, and hardly even spoke to his older brother without some sort of sneer in his tone.

This went by for another year, the same routine. He would go to school, either draw or just sit there and stare at the dry erase board with an expressionless face. When he would get home he'd march straight up to his room and ignore his father and hope to God his brother wasn't gone that night for a class, if he was his father had gotten to the point of throwing him around the house if he had enough strength and wasn't too drunk. Asher would always give his brother the same excuse because he knew Isaac needed his father still, and by telling him it would have taken away both their parents, even if their father was an out of work alcoholic now. Which didn't really mean much, with the amount of money they got from their mother's life insurance and how much their parents had already made in their combined salaries, they had plenty of money to keep up the house and eat however they want.

The only free time Asher got to himself, that he actually took, was to go and work out at the gym and work out stress and anger. One day after coming home from the gym, his father was already pissed off and tried to strike him as soon as Asher walked through the door, this was the first day that he had even tried anything with Isaac there, so as soon as their father tried anything, Asher's older brother tackled him to the ground and called the cops. The cops came and arrested their father for child abuse. That wouldn't keep him in there forever, but it was enough for Isaac to file for guardianship over Asher and they were able to continue to live where they did and Asher still try to live a normal life, just now he had the guilt on his shoulders of getting rid of both of his parents. He was only a week away from his seventeenth birthday when his brother officially got guardianship over him, and that was pretty much all the boy got for his birthday. The brothers were too worried about what they would do, at least Asher was, without parents and no job living alone and failing school.

Isaac stepped up, though, the last half of Asher's junior year and forced him to do his homework. Isaac tried his best to make Asher back into the person he was, but it was far too late for that. Asher was skittish of any older male now, couldn't stand loud noises, and hadn't stepped near a car since the day of the accident, he even refused to ride in one on the way home from the hospital. The mechanical monsters, what he calls them, should all be put out of their misery and people should learn to be healthy instead of lazy fat asses and sit on their butts to get places. At least, that is the excuse he wanted to use. Asher was just convinced he was a bad luck charm and that no one should get too close, but the boy was far too selfish to stay away from his brother, he had to have someone to be his savior.

He continued to pretend that he went to school his senior year, and still does to this day, but hardly ever attends. He's convinced he's ruined his future anyway so why bother trying too hard? The only reason he doesn't drop out is for Isaac, he wants his brother to think he's fine but he can't help but only show his true emotions around his older brother. Around everyone else he is just quiet and cold, only when someone talks to him does he say a word to them. When someone of his past talks to him he puts on some fake face and pretends that he's better and alright, and when strangers talk to him he acts as if nothing had ever happened to him not wanting to be bothered any further about what his past is about. He doesn't talk about his years between age fifteen and seventeen, he still has mental breakdowns just thinking about them. He has anger problems now, but can be shut up just by any raised voice if he knows that the person can inflict any pain on him.

He doesn't like hearing other people complain about their lives, he will just yell at them about something else that he can pick out to be wrong with them and will just leave. He drinks to numb the pain and will do any drug offered to him but swore to never buy them himself. He has stopped going to his therapy sessions simply because he wants to try to be normal and knows normal people do not have to see a therapist two times a week. His daily routine, now, is to wake up, pretend to go to school(walk of course), go home, and go to their little home gym in their parent's old bedroom and work out before doing his homework that his brother sits down with him and makes him do. He can be nice to a stranger but to anyone that can get close enough to him he lets his true anger and depression show. Passing people on the streets he will have glazed eyes that are constantly seeing his mother's face before they crashed and his father's as he threw him into walls and that is how he continuously lives his days just hoping that eventually those faces will disappear.

behind the mask

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alias laykin
age nineteen
experience 6-7 years
how'd you find us? site hopping