walker, peter bergan May 9, 2011 22:19:49 GMT -5
Post by peter on May 9, 2011 22:19:49 GMT -5
twenty. freshman in college . cuddly. musician. goofball . brendon urie.
twenty. freshman in college . cuddly. musician. goofball . brendon urie.
Peter believes in looking for the best in things. His glass is never half empty and the grass always seems to be greener on his side. This is mostly due to the fact that Peter would rather cover up the fact that his father instilled a deep, deep hate for himself. He believes that a person makes their own luck and being depressed and upset all the time will not help him get anywhere in life. Instead Peter would rather be, or at least act, happy and have things go his way. His optimism and ignorance really are the basis for the rest of his personality. Without it Peter just wouldn't be Peter. Anyone that knows him will enough, knows that he always does his best to make people smile. Smiles are contagious, right?
Unfortunately, because Peter spends so much time convincing himself that he is happy, he tends to fall in denial. Peter overlooks things that could potentially hurt him in the end and tries to trust it enough. He sets himself up for a lot of traps in this way, but Peter just rolls with it in the end. That's all he really can do. Peter would rather argue his optimism to the end of the Earth, than realize that his made up world isn't really the way things are. That is the one thing Peter is willing to argue about and make it count. He doesn't enjoy facing the reality of his life and would rather be stuck in dream land.. Peterland... where things are all fine and dandy and no one is out to hurt him.
One thing about Peter is that he is so random, crazy, and spontaneous that there is really no telling what he could do or say next. Peter hates it when things are a boring routine and he makes sure that he adds a little spice to life so to say. Around peter nothing is ever boring or uninteresting. He may randomly bust into a dance, air guitar, or even sing random tunes. It may be as crazy as saying random thing to make people laugh or making strange facial expressions. Peter is as unpredictable as a person can get and he uses that to his advantage. It's usually very easy for Peter to make friends because he can tolerate anyone. The only people he ever has anything against are those people that outright tell him they hate him.
Please, tell Peter anything and he will probably believe it or at least pretend to believe it. Peter will believe any lie that someone he trusts tells him. He's an overly trusting individual and he tends to dwell on the positive part of people. Honestly, Peter could befriend a serial killer if the guy was interesting enough and didn't kill him. Sometimes this freely given trust can get him in a lot of trouble. But it's not something that would be easy for Peter to change so he just never tried. Trust is what fuels his optimism. The only person, well, people he doesn't trust is his dad and himself. Peter is pretty hard on himself as far as liking himself goes, but that is something that he tries to tone down for the sake of his friends.
Sometimes Peter can take things pretty personally. This mostly has to do with when people critique his guitar playing or his singing...or his lyrics. That's stuff that Peter can be pretty sensitive about. He won't hold a grude over it or anything, but he will be a little anal about getting better for a while. Peter has a deep seated feeling of uselessness so he takes his talents very seriously. He's the kind of person that likes to be close to people. He likes believing that he can help people no matter how great the burden of his own problems happened to be. Leave it to Peter to be the one that wants to brighten everyone's day up for a little while. Peter's major fault is that he wants everyone else to be happy and he's willing to do that at his own expese.
Surprisingly enough there is a part of Peter that is actually pretty deep. Some of the things he says can really only be deciphered by those that know him best. His lyrics are the same way. Because his mind is so random and out there Peter tends to not hold back from voicing these little nuggets of golden wisdom. There is some depth to Peter that people don't get to see, though. He tends to watch people and listen to their words carefully. Everything said and done in the world of Peter has some sort of meaning. Even the little things have some sort of importance. Peter pays a little too much attention to the connotation of peoples' words. To him there is a huge difference in saying Hi and Hey. It's wise to choose your words carefully around him.
Yes- Peter Walker is a huge flirt. Sometimes it's just play flirting, which can only be given away by his sarcastic tone. But a lot of the time it's actual flirting. Peter just can't help being perhaps a bit too friendly at times. The catch is that Peter is not interested in a relationship or in sex. He likes the rush of flirting. Peter enjoys grinning like an idiot when a girl or a boy makes a pass at him. It 's just something that keeps him up and running. Plus, Peter knows that flirting can also make other people feel good. So when Peter flirts it is more like a constant string of compliments for the other person. He would never be so forward about anything rrelatively romantic because Peter isn't the serious type. He isn't the kind of guy that settles down because let's face it, he's a bit immature.
Mary Bailor was a young waitress at a cafe in down town Chicago. There man named Cain Walker who frequented the little cafe. It only took a few months for Cain to woo Mary into a date. One date became two, two became three, three became engagement, engagement became marriage, and marriage became sex. Eventually, to their dismay, sex became twins names Peter and Carson. Neither of them had wanted a child, but they had been so ignorant as to not use a condom so the cards fell in that area anyway. Peter was named after the doctor who delivered him and his middle name, well, that came from the sound of the first half of Cain's favorite color, burgandy. All in all their birth was no special or welcomed event. In fact, their birth was celebrated by reruns of MASH and vodka... by Mary and Cain. Peter was lucky to get noticed whenever a caring nurse would walking. It was unfortunate that Peter couldn't pick his parents.
[NEGLECT & A DRUNKEN FATHER]
Money became scarce for the Walkers. Any money his father did come across was used to buy alcohol, which would always lead to Peter and Carson being hit around a little while until they would cry. Then Cain would stand little Peter up by his shirt collar and say, "Stop that cryin, boy. A man takes the hits as they come." It didn't take long for Peter and Carson to learn that they just didn't need to cry. Peter's mother Mary was always out. When she did come in she would always forget to get Peter anything to eat. This forced Peter and Carson to have to walk over to the neighbors as children. The neighbors began to worry about their situation at home, but they did nothing about it. Later on, much to Cain and Peter's surprise, things started getting better. He had overheard his mother telling his father that she had moved up in the world and found a job that would allow her to stay home and take care of Peter so the neighbors would get off their backs. Cain didn't argue.
For a while everything seemed to go okay. Peter was just glad that his father hadn't come home drunk as often and there had been enough money to actually have dinner. It was Peter and Carson's eleventh birthday, but they had been sure that their parents didn't know that. Peter and Car was the only ones that really kept track of their birthdays. But this night was significant and it became one that will always be remembered. Cain, in a moment of fatherly affection, was going to show them how to light a cigarette. Peter didn't really think he would be into smoking, but he never argued against his father. When Cain opened the door to his and Mary's bedroom Peter's eyes widened at the disgusting site. There was his mother, naked, underneath a strange, mustached man, who also happened to be naked. Peter's mother simply rolled her eyes as the man climbed off and rushed out of the house. Her only words were, "Great, there runs a thousand dollars you bastard."
Peter didn't see his mother much after that. When he would ask his father about it he would get a rather delightful (sarcasm), "Shut the hell up, boy." So Peter quit asking questions and so did Carson. They decided to do some detective work of their own. The operation was not successful. Mary never once opened the door while he was outside it and Cain would always yell at him if he even dared to try and open the door. One saturday afternoon Peter had been sitting on the couch, watching his father watch tv when his mother had burst into the room. Peter was surprised at the amount of bruises she had. Mary announced that she was leaving. Her exact words were, "I was okay with you roughing the kids up, but you crossed the line hitting me. I'm outta here." Mary walked out and Cain's gaze was focused on Peter and Carson. Both of them tried to run, but only Carson got away. This also began a new chapter in Peter's life.
[DAD'S NEW JOB]
Imagine how surprised Peter and Carson were when they found out that their father had become a police officer. Peter would watch his father go out and protect and serve Chicago, but come home and still be just as terrible as ever. By this time Peter was afraid of his father. Between school and other activities Peter felt he had to get dinner ready, clean the house, and do anything else his father ordered him to do. Peter never cried when his father came home drunk anymore and he always tried to work around the anger issues. He knew he would have to stick it out for himself and Carson. Cain once looked up to Peter and said, "Get out of here. Leave your old man alone to die." Of course, Peter wouldn't do that. It was the one thing he wouldn't do that his father asked him to, though Carson was more willing than anything. Peter was loyal, though his father hadn't exactly been the best, he could always think about some of the better times and get over any doubts he had.
[THE STRAIGHT AND NARROW]
One of the moments Peter could remember the most was when he got suspended from school for the first time. Cain had not taken that lightly. He seized Peter by the arm, jerked him toward Peter's room and said, "Straighten up, boy. I will not have a delinquent living in my house." Peter didn't bother to explain that he had been suspeneded because he had defended his father's honor. No- he wouldn't resort to that. Peter had simply nodded in response and swore that he would try his best to straighten his act up even though he didn't believe he had an act to straighten up. Things were awkward around his father as they had always been. Peter always had to look for a way to avoid a good beating. Unfortunately, Carson, his twin, had taken a less fortunate path. His brother had begun to act out more and more and as a result Peter saw his brother have to miss weeks on end of school on claims that he had been 'injured' in an 'accident'.
[THAT BOY'S A RIOT]
High school taught Peter something, surprise, surprise. It taught him that he was into boys as well as girls. Yeah- it shocked him too. But there was a boy in his class that he felt especially close to. Peter talked to this boy every chance he got and flirted as much as he knew how. This was the first person that Peter had ever invited to come to his home. When the boy showed up Peter, of course, greeted him with a bright smile and let the boy inside. That was when Peter knew he needed to tell the boy he liked him. He just had to wait for his father to get home. Might as well kill both the birds with one stone. Peter was never too ashamed that he had a crush on a boy. To him it seemed okay. Unfortunately, his father didn't think the same thing. The other thing to worry about was his brother Carson. Carson had never agreed with Peter's personal choice, but of course, his brother tried to talk him out of what he planned to do. That wouldn't work, though.
[OUT OF THE CLOSET]
When Cain arrived home from work he said nothing to Peter or the boy. He simply sat on the couch and watched television. Peter causally led the boy into the living room, clearing his throat to get attention from his father. "Alex, I'm bi." he said rather bluntly, with a smile. Alex seemed to get the point and kissed Peter. This caused an eruption from his father. Cain ordered Alex to get out and once again Peter had gotten himself into a big mess. "No son of mine will ever be a homo." His father had said, "I told your mother that she would put the final nail in your gay coffin." Peter tried to explain that he didn't think those thoughts until after his mother had left, but it fell on deaf ears. It appeared that Cain would not associate himself with any male, including his son, that could be attracted to another male. Peter was given the beating of a life time, and this time Carson was pulled into it without having done anything at all.
[CHEATER CHEATER PUMPKIN EATER]
Things had started to get pretty tense between Peter and his brother. Carson blamed Peter for the surge of violence in their father and, of course, decided to take advantage of Peter's boy friend. Peter had been waiting for Alex to call and tell him if he could come over or not. A text had finally come through from Alex's number telling him to come right away... it was urgent. Upon entering Alex's room Peter definitely knew that he saw his boy friend screwing his twin brother. That had ended Peter's first real relationship, and he was positive that it would be his last.
behind the mask[/center]
age going on 21 may 16th
experience 8 years
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